ASK EMILY: Educational difference could divide couple

DEAR EMILY
Published: June 18, 2008

Dear Emily: I have been dating “Julie” for three weeks now, and really like her. Julie went to college and values education, while I never went to college and instead went straight from high school to getting an office job. I think by some little comments that she made to me, that she looks down on me for my decision. Is it worth me trying to convince her that I did what was best for me, or should I just accept that she may be an elitist and thus end the relationship?
— Seeing a Snob

Dear Seeing a Snob: Don’t be a snob yourself and pass judgment on Julie. Find out how she really feels about you (and education) by asking her. Give her your personal insight on how a formal education isn’t for everyone and how people need to make the choices that are best suited for them. You may not be able to change her mind (and she is entitled to her opinion), but hopefully you can get her to admit that there is another, valid, side to the argument. 

Dear Emily: I started a new job last week, and before I even got settled in, someone from the office came around asking everyone for money in order to buy another employee a wedding gift. I don’t even know the person getting married and therefore feel I shouldn’t have to chip in. Is it wrong of me to feel that I shouldn’t have to
contribute?
— Holding Back

Dear Holding Back: You may not be wrong to withhold money, but you wouldn’t be wise. Starting a new job means trying to make a good impression on everyone. You might as well make the best out of the situation and consider it an opportunity to show your new co-workers that you are a friendly person. After all, wouldn’t it be better to be known as “that nice new employee,” rather than “that stingy one”?