ASK EMILY: Sometimes a dream job is nothing but that

ASK EMILY
Published: May 14, 2008

Dear Emily: I found an opening a month ago for my dream job. I applied and was fortunate enough to get an interview. Unfortunately, the company gave the job to someone with more experience. I can’t sit back and let the opportunity pass me by. How do I not take “no” for an answer? Is there a way that I can convince this company that I am the best man for the job?
— Never Give Up

Dear Never Give Up: The answer is both yes and no. I am sorry to say that at this point there is no way to convince the company.  But I also said yes because there is a way, with your next interview. So your first interview didn’t work.  My advice is really prepare for your interview next time, both mentally and physically. Dress the part and have plenty of copies of your resume to pass around. Mentally, be confident and conscientious on your interview day.

Dear Emily: I am 27 years old and live with my sister who’s 24. She needed a place to stay for a while. We get along great, except when it comes to my girlfriend. The two of them don’t get along at all and can be very catty towards each other. I’ve asked them both to just ignore the other and get along, but they refuse. How do I get some peace without really upsetting either my girlfriend or sister?
— Bad Blood

Dear Bad Blood: If you already asked the to behave, you might have to make a tough decision to end the bad behavior.  If you’re serious about this girlfriend and are willing to overlook this childishness, ask your sister to find her own place ASAP. On the other hand you can choose your sister over the girlfriend and end that relationship. Then start looking for a more serious partner who is more mature and respectful.

Dear Emily: My friend is 33, single, and has never had a serious relationship. She is hung up on people’s looks, and when she meets a nice guy, she won’t give him a second chance if he isn’t “super hot.” I’m worried she is going to be single forever if she doesn’t get off her high horse and realize there are more important things than outward appearances.
— Shallow Girl’s Friend

Dear Shallow Girl’s Friend: I am afraid you might be projecting your feelings and desires onto your friend. I think we can both agree that your friend is a big girl, capable of rationalizing and making her own decisions. Maybe in her world she is not concerned with a soul mate, serious boyfriend or anything more than some arm candy.  Just because you might be unhappy over her situation, don’t assume she is.