By David S. Kerr

Published: April 17, 2008

America is often called a litigious society. In other words, we sue one another over just about anything. While some may view this as a new trend, and certainly the number of lawsuits handled by our judicial system grows each year, suing one another is a long-standing part of the Anglo Saxon legal tradition. However, in recent years we Americans may have carried this practice just a bit too far.

You name it — an offensive comment, a minor traffic accident or perhaps a host of minor and often rather silly arguments between neighbors — and off we go to court. Lawsuits, and then some sort of financial compensation, seem to be the course we follow in addressing every perceived wrong. While it keeps the lawyers busy, it certainly doesn’t contribute to a civil society.

Not every other country in the world is so anxious to see its citizens solve their problems in the courts. Japan is a good example. The Japanese aren’t perfect, by no means, but when it comes to dealing with wrongs and interpersonal conflicts, they have an entirely different perspective. The notion of suing one another over every wrong or injury and then seeking financial compensation is an alien concept to most Japanese.

Perhaps some of this is based in their tradition of cooperation. Their country is very different from ours. They have a large population packed into small islands. This can either breed cooperation or conflict. The Japanese, as a rule, when it comes to matters we Americans would gladly go to court over, tend to like to work things out amongst themselves. What’s more, they put a lot more emphasis, when they suffer an injury, on apology and forgiveness, than they do in seeking redress in the courts or financial compensation.

To the Japanese, going to court and pursuing a lawsuit, at least in most circumstances, is considered uncivil behavior. They do have lawyers, and they do have courts, and people do sue one another, but it’s not that common. Last year, in the U.S., Americans filed 18 million lawsuits. That’s the equivalent of, say, one lawsuit for every resident of Florida. In Japan last year there were only 70,000 lawsuits. Some of this disparity, though not necessarily a cause and effect relationship, can be traced to the number of lawyers. I have nothing against lawyers. Many of our founding fathers were attorneys, and I consider it a noble profession, but America has more attorneys per person than any other country. Japan is almost the exact opposite.

One of the reasons the Japanese are so averse to lawsuits is because they view most conflicts as matters to be sorted between individuals.

What’s more, in a case that involves a wrong, even a serious one, an apology, and then forgiveness, is considered more valuable than a financial settlement. This is a long tradition in Japanese society.

So perhaps there is a lesson in the Japanese view of apology and forgiveness.
A long time ago, when I was first learning to drive, I backed my mom’s car, which was, as cars were in those days, about the size of a 747, into another car at a gas station. The owner of the car I hit, a Navy captain, was nice about it all, and since this was my first accident, led me through the entire process. Not long afterwards my father suggested I write him a letter of apology. I felt badly about my poor driving, and as my dad put it, began to learn that “the rear-view mirror isn’t there for decoration.”
It also made me feel better to express my regret. The captain called me a while later, said he was surprised by the note, and concluded by saying “let’s just forget the whole thing.” That was unusually generous, given that I certainly was responsible for the damages, but it made me appreciate the importance of an apology, an earnest one, that is.

John Wayne, one of my favorite movie actors, in the movie, “She wore a Yellow Ribbon,” was always reminding his officers to “…never apologize, it’s a sign of weakness.” But that was John Wayne and maybe, in this one case the Duke, who in his roles modeled some of the best traits of the American character, didn’t have it right. Perhaps instead, when we do something we shouldn’t have, when we make a mistake, or something simply goes wrong, we simply need to say we’re sorry. That doesn’t mean it will be accepted (after all, that notion would upset injury lawyers everywhere) but it might start a trend.

David S. Kerr is an Aquia resident and a former member of the Stafford County School Board. Contact him at